After Liam, my 9-year-old’s productive cough: “Mom, I have mucus on my shirt!” After 10 days of Will coughing, the doctor’s diagnosis: “I really think it’s a virus; give it another 10 days.”
Liam, while digitally measuring his fever under his arm for the fourth consecutive day: “Yup, the numbers are still increasing!”
After Will, my 11-year-old, goes night skiing with his school’s ski club for the first time: “I even went down a slope that wasn't lit!” Me: “Perhaps the slope was closed?” Will: “No there were lots of tracks.” And I couldn't bring myself to say, “From skiers earlier in the day? As in… the past?? The daylight??”
Me to Bill, in preparation for the Blizzard of 2015: “You might want to pick up fire starters for the fireplace on the way home.” Bill: “Do we need anything else?” Me: “Yes, marshmallows and Hershey’s bars.”
For you see, we know that we don’t need to strip bottled water off the grocery store shelves during a blizzard. All the things I need to know for a blizzard I learned by reading Little House on the Prairie -- and living on the prairie for a good number of years: Snow is frozen water, folks! But big-ass Hershey’s bars don’t spring from snow banks. I sent the right man for the job; I never buy this size Hershey’s for S’mores...
Gotta love that man.